Ok, so I'm not literally dead, just the old me. The pre-married me. I have discovered a few things married Lindsay does that single Lindsay would NEVER have done! here are just a few:
1. New Lindsay has a separate load of laundry just for socks. All man socks are washed in a different load because man socks are soooo smelly that they make any laundry that shares the same washing water smell like feet. How come no one told me that guys are so smelly?!?!
2. New Lindsay realized that she will never again, as long as she lives, be able to own a posh and very designery adorable white bath rug for the guest bathroom. Just not going to happen. White, especially in close proximity to boots, doesn't last long around a man like mine. I always thought design doesn't compromise, but apparently Mrs. Design does. :)
3. New Lindsay buys MAYONNAISE!!! In my 29 years, I have never, ever, bought mayonnaise, nor was I ever planning on it. Oh boy, I buy it now. In the industrial 5 lb. jar. I am so tempted to tell every lady that looks into my cart as she walks by me in the grocery "this is not for me!!!!!" but then I look into her cart and see a 10 lb. can of nacho cheese and figure we're in the same boat.
4. New Lindsay says things like "you are covered in diesel fuel" and "I was trying to super-glue this huge cut on your hand closed and...oops....now my finger is stuck to your cut" and "Rather than throwing that couch away, you cut it up and burned it piece-by-piece in the grill? Very creative."
In all seriousness, my life is awesome, whatahusband is awesome, and I have no complaints. I am realizing, though, that when I started a new life with somebody else, I became new too. I became a part of something that has profoundly changed the course of my life, and although it has been an adjustment, in wonderful and sometimes difficult ways, I couldn't have made a better choice. Except for the mayonnaise. :)
7 years ago
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