I have always loved a good speech. In the movies when the music swells and the long dialogue begins, ah yes, now it's getting good. When I taught in a classroom, I loved preparing my lectures. I always hoped each lesson would inspire, change, or teach a concept that up to that moment, was unknown to the listener. To take intangible ideas and put them into concrete ideas and be able to pass that along to another person is a feeling I will never tire of. I have always wondered if this is why I love art and music so much; for in their most basic form, they solidify the things we cannot bottle - feelings, ideas, and themes are transformed into lines, notes, patterns, strokes, and even color.
At my house, it's called the soapbox. I get all fired up about a subject and we all know the speech is coming. Russell has even offered to fashion me a little box to stand on to make my "fits with words" a little more exciting.
It's a blessing and a curse; in it's most glorious form the soapbox is a statement of truth and a way to publicly confirm one's commitment to following it. In it's ugliest form; judgement. I pray God will always help me to tame my tongue and seek forgiveness when I do judge.
Which brings me to this post. A soapbox has been brewing in the last few months and it's finally time to let it all out. After I was married, I was given many words of congratulations and happiness. But - one phrase has been repeated over and over again, "Just you wait." I have been told "Just you wait - in a few years you won't be able to stand eachother". "Just you wait, the honeymoon only lasts so long". "Just you wait - when life gets back to normal you won't think marriage is so great". Just wait. Wait for what...Wait to be miserable? Wait to be unhappy? Wait to realize that this thing called marriage was something one endures and not something to enjoy? Wait. Wait. Wait. I did wait - I waited for God's best for me. I carefully chose my mate after many years of being single, and God blessed me more abundantly that I could ever have imagined. I am content with him - we have great days and days that need a little more patience and forgiveness (and maybe wine), but we are happy and so thankful for eachother. What was I missing?
Ok, time to look at the other side. I thought maybe there were 2 explanations for the warning: I am a newlywed and do not know what REAL marriage was going to be like and a little warning is always nice. Or #2) that I was older than many other brides and in a different stage of life. Perhaps I would need to know that it was all going to get hairy soon...learning to give up my independence and live with an already established man in his 30's that would likely not yield to new ideas would not be fun.
As these possibilities ran through my mind mixed with the truth of my marriage and of God, the phrase "Just you wait" slowly began to change from ugly to beautiful. The warnings are gone, and I can tell you this is what I will wait for:
Just you wait - you think you love him now but your heart will deepen for this man with each passing year.
Just you wait - God will show you your best and worst, and your husband will see it all, and he will still love you.
Just you wait - after you hurt him, or he hurts you, your love for eachother will get stronger, not weaker.
Just you wait - there is beauty and purpose in commitment and God has set you on a path you will praise Him for.
Just you wait.
7 years ago
