I have always wanted to be a part of a group exercise class like jazzersize or something...and then I found it! I'm joining this awesome exercise class called Les Mills Bodypump, and I was very excited when I found this photo online because it looks like the class would include dancing of some kind, and if I'm lucky - ribbon dancing. Awesome. I know my marathon-ing days are over, so I grabbed my running shorts and headed to the gym to pay for a membership.
It's my first day in class and I'm thinking "Bodypump, eh? I hope they'll teach me which parts I'm supposed to pump, hee hee". As I am deep in contemplation as to which one of the jokes I just made up about pumping I'm going to tell the lady next to me, she points to a barbell and says "you're going to need one of those." I smile. Oh lady, you told me a joke first, and I like you. Then, the instructor walks in. No, this is not the cute blonde in a warm-up suit with a yellow dancing ribbon from my internet picture... It's a 6'2" ripped dude with a FULL beard, carrying a 50 lb. body bar. He walks up to the stage and says, deeply "let's do this." I am freaking out. This guy doesn't pump hips, he pumps cars.
So, I calmly grab a barbell, load some 10 lb. weights at each end, sling it over my head and rest it on my shoulders, and proceed to undergo the most painful 1 hour exercises class I have EVER experienced. Strong Beard was not letting me get away with being the new kid. "I see you, do it right" he says over the microphone as he does a one handed push up holding a dumbell in the air with his other hand. I thought maybe I'd take that microphone and pump it up his....anyway I'm either going to be in the best shape of my life or I just paid way too much for a plastic gym membership card to keep in my wallet.
7 years ago







